How Mindfulness can lead to a Mental Breakdown
Mindfulness and Meditation are all the hype these days. According to The Global Wellness Institute; the wellness industry hit 4.2 Trillion Dollars in 2019. It’s no wonder why we are feeling societal pressure to become enlightened. Many Celebrities, Public Speakers, and Government Officials are also buying into the hype boasting about how their daily meditation practice has helped them to achieve all of their major life successes. To make matters even more encouraging; we are also dealing with Quantum Physics “The Law of Attraction” craze. Placing blame on us if our lives are not exactly how we want them to be. So what do we do with all of this? Well of course we buy into it. Because by getting our minds “right” we can control if we own the Tesla, own the house by the sea, and attract our perfect lover. Right?
What’s the problem with Meditation?
At the heart of it? Nothing. Meditation is a wonderful practice that I enjoy twice a day; upon waking, and before bed. I have benefited tremendously from this ancient practice. I have noticed I am calmer in situations that normally had been stressful. I have noticed my emotional state is consistent. I am now slow to rise in anger. Also, I have become very clear about my goals for my life. All of this is wonderful and should be celebrated.
The problem I have with Meditation is it’s the most simple practice that people complicate. All it takes is one deciding they want to meditate, find a quiet safe space to sit and close their eyes, breathe in, breathe out, observe the thoughts that come in and then let them go. That’s it! It’s so simple! So why the complication? Oh Right! Because, it’s part of a big fat industry churning the money machine.
The fact is this beautiful practice is ready and available for anyone to enjoy. Yet, so often I get “Oh. I would love to meditate, but I don’t know how to do it right”. There is no doing it right. There is only doing it. This is why it’s called a PRACTICE.
The Dangers of Attraction, Mindfulness, and Meditation
A while back I was going through a turbulent life change. I decided to get clear I was going to go all into doing as much spiritual work as I could. I dedicated myself to a regimented meditation practice, I listened to Abraham Hicks, and I visualized specific scenarios to manifest exactly how I wanted my life to look. In a few weeks, I felt very good. I was happy, thriving, and doing well when it came to hitting my career goals. Then I was up for a job. Not only a job… it was THE JOB. I felt so ready. I knew that my hard work helped me to manifest this opportunity.
From the moment I knew this job could be a manifestation in my life, I went full-on into Jedi mode. Every meditation was a visualization. I monitored my emotions like a first-time mother with her newborn baby. I made sure I was in a place of positivity. If fear or sadness crept in I pushed it away and quickly forced myself into a state of happiness. I knew I was going to achieve my goal.
So when I saw that in fact, my dream job went to another colleague I took a deep breath, pulled myself up by my bootstraps, and said “Oh well. I am sure there is something better coming my way”.
Yeah right. NOT EVEN CLOSE. I wish that was what I did. No. Instead, I had a complete mental breakdown. I cried for days, I couldn’t sleep, I couldn’t eat, I kept replaying the scenario in my head. How could this not have worked out? I manifested it. I never had a doubt. I saw it clearly in my mind’s eye. What did I do wrong in the process of receiving? The law of attraction said it was mine. All of the teachers said I would get there if I stayed happy, if I meditated, and visualized. So what the fuck?
Please Believe Me…
I am not writing this post to deter you from a meditation, or mindfulness practice. I am writing to tell you what I have learned, and how I can help save you from a nervous breakdown.
I had no choice but to re-access after that emotional episode. It was a very disappointing realization to know I was not as far along spiritually as I wanted to be. But why was I putting this internal pressure on myself? Whose standards was I trying to live up to? When I took stock of my well being I realized I was pressuring myself to be somebody in society’s eyes. To live up to some impossible standard of success. By not getting that job made me feel like a failure, and had me living in a limiting belief that I would be nobody without that credit on my resume. I was feeding myself complete bowls of nonsense.
I wish I knew then what I know now. That emotions are there to serve us. It is okay to acknowledge my fears and sadness. They are there to protect me. I use meditation as a reset point; instead of some magical voodoo that is going to bring me fame, and riches. Meditation helps me notice my emotions, so I can deal with them appropriately. If I am sad; then perhaps it’s time to get grateful. If I am angry; it’s time to breathe. The Universe is well being, so because we are from spirit our emotional set point is also well being. When I am well, I am attracting more good to me. Whatever that may be. I got S.M.A.R.T about my goals, and plan each step accordingly. I gave in to the notion that I am enough as is, and anything else I may achieve in life is just a bonus. I decided to reject society’s interpretation of what it is to be happy. When I honestly look at the people with the car, and the house, and the spouse… the picture is never quite as it seems. Also, most of the time these people have their own battles with unhappiness.
YOU ARE ENOUGH. AS-IS. RIGHT NOW. No job, ambition, person, goal, or material object will make that more or less true. Use meditation as a tool to help you reset back to the best version of you. We need to be in the flow of life to receive anything we are manifesting. So relax. Have goals and dreams; but when you ask, remember to then let it go. Trust that good is coming to you. Go for a run, enjoy a lover, and smell the flowers. But don’t become a cracked-out maniac trying to force it into manifestation. You will drive yourself crazy. No one likes being bullied, and neither does Source Energy.
Written By: Monica Quinn
